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dear 8 year old self:
i know you cried when you asked for spaghetti and meatballs for your birthday after you took one bite and realized it was turkey burger. ewwwww. you probably looked really snobby and spoiled. but i guess it was your birthday, and you shouldn't have to eat healthy grossness on your birthday. sometimes moms forget these things. it's not their fault. they do make the best chocolate orange birthday cakes in the whole wide world.
but try not to worry. some day, when you're really old (like as old as your "when i grow up" assignment in school, where you're going to be married and have 3 kids and be an art teacher, or pilot, or whatever was the career choice of the day at that point), 25 whole years old, you will try turkey burger again and find that it really is as delicious as your mom told you it is.
the trick is to go to your favorite tea house slash bistro and order their special of the day, which is a feta thyme turkey burger. you can even get it with salt and vinegar chips, which you will also grow to like someday. will the surprises never cease??
when this happens (i know you don't believe me, but it will), make sure you tell your mom so she can gloat and tell you how moms are always right, and she knew it all along. because she deserves it. after you made her look practically abusive for crying in front of everyone on your birthday (at least, that's how you will remember it when you're old as dirt).
love,
your very very very old dinosaur bones self
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